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I Know I Have That Sweet Meat, But THIS Is Ridiculous.

Monday afternoon I noticed my thigh itching. I rubbed it through my jeans, but it was pretty intense. When I looked, I noticed a small red bump surrounded by welts from my scratching. Immediately I thought, spider bite. However, research (on the Internets) shows that spiders rarely bite. Hmmmm.

A little later my knee and ankle began to itch. I looked. 2 more red bumps on my knee and 1 on my ankle. Now I was upset. I bruise easily, and when something bites me it leaves a mark for quite a while. I don’t need/want that.

I went to bed that night (after changing sheets and pillow cases), and guess what? Yep. I woke up with 2 new bites (other knee and right on my tattoo outline) and an itchy area on my leg (although I could see no bite, I thought it was coming). I searched all around my bed. Under the mattress, under the bed, on/in the nightstand. Nothing.

I grabbed my pillow and a new blanket from the linen and headed to the couch, quite pissed. When I awoke, I had a small red bump under my arm.

Now, this is ridiculous.

I spend a good portion of the day trying to find out if they are flea or spider bites. Could be either. I don’t see fleas, I don’t see spiders…so WHO KNOWS what the heck is feasting on my tastiness.

The itchy area on my leg, yea…turned into a bump. Larger than the rest. Probably because the day before I was scratching the area like crazy.I know, scratching is bad. Don’t need scolding Internets.

In my (Internet) research, I came across bed bugs. FIRST THOUGHT, ewwwwww…that’s for nasty/dirty people. But further (Internet) research says NO. Bed bugs can come very easily, in bags from visitors, etc. Now, I’ve never gotten a bite before. And no one has come to my house or stayed the night. So, how would they get there (if they are indeed the reason for my polka dot skin)? More research indicated that when living in a shared dwelling (read apartment) they can come through the walls! Do you hear me Internets??? That wall that I eagerly was pressing my ear against could be the pathway for my nightmare! Or not. Cause really, it could be a spider. Or a flea. Or something else. I don’t know.

Right now, the first ones that I got are smaller in size…and dark red. Look to be (maybe) healing. And they don’t itch as much as they did.

“Put some lotion on it.” Raphie says. “I’m a doctor. Lotion fixes everything. Just do it.”

Right.

The newer ones are a bit more itchy, but I put a Cortisone cream on it and I think I’ll manage.

If I start to go blind, I’ll call you. K?

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